Help! I've run out of options with my hair! Any good suggestions?

I am african american and have natural, kinky, very curly, and nappy hair. My sister got a relaxer at the age of 12 and her hair broke off and she got really bad split ends. Our stylist at the time, kept insisting on cutting her split ends off and soon, her hair got very short and uneven. She was very unhappy with the results and my mom decided that she wanted to go natural and would not let me relax my hair either. After I got to middle school, I became very discourage, because my hair was never manageable enough and I wore my hair up EVERY SINGLE DAY! So perm is totally out of the question. I tried natural and that didnt work to great either. I tried to convince my mom that keratin treatments would work but we soon found out about the formaldehyde problem and the dangers of doing that. So now, we've just moved and no longer go to our amazing dominican hair stylist who kept my hair pretty straight and I don't know what to do! Any suggestions?